Spark

[aardogs]

Last Friday I went and got Panic. I only intended on having him here for the duration of my fall break, but when I saw him this time after being apart since August something hit me like a sack of bricks. Panic has gotten older, and I can finally see it in him.



Four years ago I made the decision to come to Wooster, and while it was certainly the best decision I could have made for myself, I had to miss so much of Panic's life. Our agility career was cut short just when we were becoming a consistent team, and our relationship overall is not as strong as it used to be. My head was once fully in the dog world. There are a lot of passions pulling for my attention but the one towards dog sports is pulling at me less and less as the years go by. Sometimes we will go to a show, or I will watch a video or following a big event like AWC and feel that spark again, briefly but intensely. I miss it, I miss that intensity and that passion. But for now at least it's best to leave that spark alone. I don't want it to die out, but I will hold it carefully, presciously, in a corner of my heart. I know he misses it to. The sport itself, but there's something else there too. I haven't found any other outlet that forges such a bond as training and showing in agility does.




But enough about that--the point is that Panic is here and I've decided he will stay. When I bring him here he really isn't my dog anymore. He becomes a part of this community, just like I have. There are people I love and trust and that I know will help care for him if things get overwhelming, not that he needs to be cared for much. He's taking care of all of us way more than we're taking care of him. It doesn't make sense for him to be anywhere else anymore. Besides, the squirrles here are fat and lazy and so easy to chase.

Comments

[nosemovie.livejournal.com]

ooooh Fat lazy squirrels!! that's HEAVEN right there (there's one living in our backyard and driving Razor crazy this fall)

I'm so glad he's with you. I know you're horribly busy. But he's quite the guy, and the love he can spread around is worth SO MUCH... Good man Panic.

[aardogs.livejournal.com]

The good thing is that he can come with me to my studio while I work--which he HATES because it's sooo boring but I think being annoyed with me is one of his great joys in life.

[nosemovie.livejournal.com]

Oh also, on agility.

I didn't get into agility until I was nearly 40 years old! I suspect it will stick around for the long-haul. Point being, you need to do these things you're doing now. There's NO WAY I could have done any real dog training in my early 30s when Allison was a wee lass. No way. So... remember it. Watch it and like you said, keep it in your heart. You'll get back to it when you can.

[aardogs.livejournal.com]

I think so to. There are so many things that I've gotten to do once I let go of agility that are time-sensitive to being my age. Agility I can do at any point in my life.

[moodypdx.livejournal.com]

Oh, so good to hear from you, we think about you often. I am glad Panic is with you, this makes me very happy for everyone involved, but mostly you and Panic;) Agility, eh, it comes and goes, and will probably always be here. I imagine
someday of you decide to do it again with another dog that you will be in a place that will make it easy for you. Just so glad you posted;)

[aardogs.livejournal.com]

Agility has been a part of my life for well over half my life and it's been so important to me in so many ways, it's very very hard for me to let go of it for a lot of reasons. But yes, I do think one day I'll get back into it.

[purpledogs.livejournal.com]

Happy, happy that he is with you. Seeing their age can really knock the wind out of you... some of that this year on my end as well. Big hugs to Panic and his community family.

I miss you! When I get back to the states, it would be lovely to catch up somehow, if you're game. I'm going to keep that in my head just in case. :)

[aardogs.livejournal.com]

That would be awesome Tori. I have no idea where I'll be living or what I'll be doing but here's an open invitation to come visit and stay with me in my theroetical future location. ;) It's been years!!

[nosemovie.livejournal.com]

You should BOTH come out here. That would certainly be the Perfect Storm!! hahahahah

[penichops.livejournal.com]

Smiley face smiley face smiley face

[kokopellizen.livejournal.com]

Yay! This makes me happy for you both. :)